I Just Want to Be the Artist

Many a time I’ve wished that I

Could be somebody else

Like Willie Nelson or Patsy Cline

Or maybe even Prince

But Johnny Cash was more my style

When he covered Nine Inch Nails

To know that I can be myself

Is like getting out of jail

 

(chorus)

I don’t want to be the artist

Formerly known as “Me”

I don’t want to be the artist

That got too drunk to see

I don’t want to be the artist

That cut off his damned ear

I just want to be the artist

That’s all here

 

I thought that I could ease the pain

Anesthetize myself

But when I drank and smoked that rope

I sacrificed my health

I hid my gift—I lost my voice

Was that a conscious choice?

I’m glad I’m clean and sober now

And I can offer up this vow

 

For too long my story song

Was all about self hate

I cursed the world for everything

Myself—I’d mutilate

If the voices had but talked to me

I’d not have felt so alone

Or longed for a lobotomy

With a rusty old soup spoon

 

 

 Thomas Hubbard (1/20/2006)

<